[0.000 --> 13.440] So you've already decided whether you like me or not. [13.440 --> 19.360] And you did that within a fraction of a second of seeing me. [19.360 --> 25.520] You made that unconscious choice the moment I walked on. [25.520 --> 31.600] You saw my behaviour, my body language, my nonverbal behaviour, my tone of voice as well [31.600 --> 33.000] that you're hearing now. [33.000 --> 37.800] And there's a part of your brain which if we take evolution as a given and we're going [37.800 --> 42.260] to have to take evolution as a given during the whole of my speech because all of my work [42.260 --> 48.240] relies on evolutionary psychology and behavioral evolutionary psychology and neural architecture [48.240 --> 49.320] based on evolution. [49.320 --> 56.720] So it's rather like if you play catching fairies with my daughter Stella you have to believe [56.720 --> 62.200] in fairies or you have to put on a really good performance that you believe in fairies [62.200 --> 64.360] because otherwise it's just no fun. [64.360 --> 69.400] So taking evolution as a given there's a part of your brain it sits right on top of your [69.400 --> 71.640] spine goes up inside of your head. [71.640 --> 77.160] Some people call it the brain stem or the R complex or the reptilian brain or the primitive [77.160 --> 85.920] brain and it makes snap judgments about everybody around it and everybody around you uses that [85.920 --> 90.440] part of their brain to make snap judgments about you. [90.440 --> 97.480] And based on behaviour it decides should we approach this person are they going to be [97.480 --> 103.200] good for us or should we retreat because they're going to be a huge risk. [103.200 --> 108.800] In fact if I open this idea out a little bit more there are simply four categories that [108.800 --> 112.720] your primitive brain has for everybody else around it. [112.720 --> 116.960] So as I walked on there were four potential categories for me. [116.960 --> 123.640] I came on stage I start behaving and your primitive brain says is Mark giving us some [123.640 --> 131.200] minimum specifications based on 500 million years of evolutionary data that he's possibly [131.200 --> 132.640] a friend for us. [132.800 --> 134.720] Is he going to supply to us. [134.720 --> 141.280] Do we see some signals that give us that gut reaction that this is going to be good. [141.280 --> 149.240] He's a good person and if you put me into that friend category you're now cherry picking [149.240 --> 153.600] from all the data that I've got using your neocortex which is about 200 thousand years [153.600 --> 159.520] old pretty new using that neocortex cherry picking all the data that fits your brain [159.520 --> 163.440] so that stems theory and assumption about me being a friend. [163.440 --> 169.760] Okay now I could come on and you might pick up some minimum specifications that Mark is [169.760 --> 172.080] an enemy to me a predator. [172.080 --> 177.200] Now I'm not trying to do those but if they accidentally happened you'd then put me into [177.200 --> 183.200] predicate category you do the retreat response instead of the approach response that you do [183.200 --> 188.800] around the friend category and then you send a message all unconsciously all unconscious [188.800 --> 196.720] choices to your neocortex gut saying go and get me all the data that proves Mark is the [196.720 --> 197.720] enemy to me. [197.720 --> 201.280] Of course the neocortex might go hey I don't really know this guy and he's not really [201.280 --> 207.440] said very much that I can discern so far so I'll just make up a load of stuff about him. [207.440 --> 213.880] I'll just make up some stories and some narratives that makes him bad yeah equally so if I come [213.880 --> 220.000] on and I trigger friend with your brain stem you equally if you can't find any data that [220.000 --> 223.880] makes me friend you just make up a whole bunch of stories about me that make me really [223.880 --> 224.880] good. [224.880 --> 231.240] Now the third category I come on I behave and for some reason you think ah Mark potential [231.240 --> 241.120] sexual partner for me. [241.120 --> 247.800] So when I do this not usually that much laughter okay. [247.800 --> 253.800] No look obviously I'm not trying to get into that category with you my wife's over there [253.800 --> 259.240] traces over there her Tracy so you know not trying to get in that category but these things [259.240 --> 261.600] can happen by accident. [261.600 --> 267.240] For example your brain stem is looking for things like does Mark look a little bit like [267.240 --> 273.760] me is he like me does he look to be kind of like one of my tribe one of my group one [273.760 --> 279.600] of my gang one of my company almost my family but not quite because you know genetic says [279.600 --> 284.440] that wouldn't be very very useful for us it wouldn't play out well so is he like me [284.440 --> 289.840] is does his hair look good does it look like it has good mineral content in it so it's [289.840 --> 293.520] got good color you're actually stroking your hair as you're as I'm talking about this [293.520 --> 299.240] right you madam I can I can read people right from here yeah don't look cool now don't [299.240 --> 304.760] look cool nothing happening here Tracy nothing going on nothing going on nothing going [304.760 --> 310.080] on so does it look like it has good mineral content in it and does it have a shine to [310.080 --> 315.520] it because that would mean there's probably a good omega-3 fatty acid diet and therefore [315.520 --> 320.560] I come from a land where there's good resource and I look a bit like you so if we were [320.560 --> 326.360] to mate and there was offspring well they grow up with good genetic code and in a land [326.360 --> 330.640] where there's opulence and food okay that's why we have those conditioner ads with the [330.640 --> 336.280] little flick of the hair and all of that yeah oh there's also with the which things like [336.280 --> 342.040] the pick up guys called peacocking which is you know where you've got you know beautiful [342.040 --> 353.040] colors that flash yeah again for me this is just style so if I come now here's the important [353.040 --> 358.720] bit here's the important bit because if I come on and I don't trigger friend or enemy [358.720 --> 362.400] or potential sexual partner with you which for those I triggered that you might want to [362.400 --> 367.680] start an orderly queue just turn there sometimes it goes around the whole block but that's [367.680 --> 373.360] okay if I haven't triggered those here's the important thing for us here today you are now [373.360 --> 382.720] indifferent to me and here's what you're hearing and your mind is off imagining the potential [382.720 --> 388.920] enemies or friends or sexual partners now there are seven billion people on the planet [388.920 --> 394.120] right now what do you think is the default category for anybody knew that you meet on this [394.120 --> 404.760] earth indifferent absolutely you are pre-programmed to be indifferent to the seven billion people [404.760 --> 412.080] on this planet right now and here's my problem I don't know I don't many of you out here to [412.080 --> 416.840] I mean the majority there's there's Tracey and Jennifer over there and that's always good yeah but [416.840 --> 423.400] the rest of you that they're my friends and family but the rest of you I don't know you don't [423.400 --> 431.080] know me which means you're designed to be indifferent to me right now and I have a really important [431.080 --> 439.640] message for you today but evolutionary psychology says and behavioral psychology says that you're just [439.640 --> 447.080] not going to pay attention to me unless I can get in the category of friend with you and so that's [447.080 --> 454.040] what I've been doing all the time I've been on here so far I've been giving you the signals to [454.040 --> 461.080] your primitive brain that will trigger you to cause me to go into friend category with you and [461.080 --> 468.040] cherry pick from all the language that I've given you only the stuff that is good and if you [468.040 --> 474.200] couldn't find anything good you've been making it up in your head so I just want to let you into [474.200 --> 479.160] the secret because I want you to be able to do this you know with your friends and family and [479.160 --> 484.200] help work and wherever you want to do this kind of thing I think should be free to all so here's [484.200 --> 489.400] what I've been doing look you know all this stuff this stuff's easy the smile okay smile it's a [489.400 --> 494.680] universal signal across the planet okay it's the same whatever whatever place you come from whoever [494.680 --> 498.600] you were born to whether you were born at the top of the mountain or down by a lake doesn't matter [498.600 --> 503.480] your country doesn't matter who your parents were everybody smiles the same the muscles here [503.480 --> 512.760] tighten to pull up the sides of the lips but that's not enough friend enemy or potential sexual partner [515.800 --> 520.280] for those of you at the back who are distanced from me you're indifferent to me right now [520.280 --> 526.520] but these people down the front in close proximity almost certainly in personal space or social space [526.520 --> 533.000] here yeah you are getting triggered with the minimum specifications for a predator which is not the [533.000 --> 540.120] full signal yeah half signal insufficient data when insufficient data your primitive brain defaults [540.120 --> 546.200] to negatives I can't do a half smile yeah I can't do a t-tee smile either that's get out of my [546.200 --> 553.640] territory yeah I bite so I need to narrow the eyes here which will cause wrinkles to happen here [553.640 --> 561.240] I can't flash this signal to you either I can't just go like that we know that the smile must [561.240 --> 568.040] build over three seconds and it must sustain for about three seconds otherwise it's insufficient data [568.040 --> 572.840] and your primitive brain goes ah predator it doesn't get the full signal better be safe than sorry [572.840 --> 578.120] the fight and flight system would rather judge me as a predator when I'm not and behave as if I'm [578.120 --> 584.920] a predator just to be safe so if I can sustain this and build this over about three seconds narrow [584.920 --> 591.480] those eyes and get that smile and get eye contact with some people they'll smile back at me [592.680 --> 601.160] yeah there we go good that's good now what I add to this is called the eyebrow flash okay the eyebrows [601.400 --> 609.640] flash up in fact sometimes I sustain it for a long time yeah and this is a universal signal for I [609.640 --> 614.360] recognize you I know you're my friend you're a friend of the family you can do this walking down [614.360 --> 622.200] the street you walk down a street like this and you go and literally it triggers their primitive [622.200 --> 627.000] brain and they're like oh hey hey good to meet you when was it we last yeah no it was last week [627.000 --> 631.800] wasn't it and yeah how are the kids and and after about five minutes they're like so where do I [631.800 --> 638.600] know you from you like you don't bye bye well off you go fantastic you can try this here's the [638.600 --> 645.480] really important one here's the really important one is I show you no tools no weapons empty hands it's [645.480 --> 651.240] a universal signal okay for I come unarmed we're diss if Darwin was right we descendant from [651.240 --> 658.040] ground-welling mammals as the forests of Africa receded during climate change yeah the planes [658.040 --> 663.240] started to open up the ground-welling mammal decided I will stand upright didn't do it in a few [663.240 --> 670.360] hours obviously took hundreds of thousands of years stood upright when it stood upright great it [670.360 --> 674.920] had control of the hands now that's really useful I can be tactile I can manipulate the world around [674.920 --> 680.920] me but also now my belly area with lots of soft delicate organs in is not protected by the [680.920 --> 688.120] ground that means under stress I better protect that and if I'm not under stress if I'm not a predator [688.120 --> 694.760] and you're not a predator then I display this area to you with no tools no weapons I call this [694.760 --> 701.320] area the truth plane because this is where you'll get stimulated and triggered at an unconscious [701.320 --> 710.680] level to choose me as being honest and truthful and good to be around and if I smile with that as [710.680 --> 718.280] well and raise my eyebrows you all go mark could read the telephone directory to us because you [718.280 --> 726.280] cherry pick the numbers that you were thought were great in it now at this point what people usually [726.280 --> 737.720] start to think is actually mark I'm getting a little bit disappointed now yeah because you kind [737.720 --> 753.320] of manipulating us aren't you yeah and yeah absolutely am and you say mark why can't you be honest [754.280 --> 761.960] yeah why can't you just be truthful why can't you just be authentic with us you know Mark you've [761.960 --> 769.640] got some great ideas just deliver them how you like build it and they will come well I'm telling you [769.640 --> 779.000] they are not going to show up they're going to watch breaking bad yeah it's the final episode on Sunday [779.000 --> 791.400] it's a good show it's a great show yeah and here's the thing if I was really authentic with you [792.120 --> 801.560] right now and didn't use the behaviors that I've learnt and become highly skilled in in order to [801.560 --> 808.040] become a good speaker around you if I don't use my countermeasures to the fight and flight system [808.600 --> 815.000] as I'm I've decided not to do now you'll see I'm not a good speaker I'm just highly skilled in [815.000 --> 823.000] technique in fact if if I were to be honest about this and authentic with you and by authentic I mean [824.360 --> 830.040] that for me authenticity is you know what's good for you you know what's bad for you and you will [830.040 --> 836.520] do what's good for you and right and feels right for you at an instinctual level regardless [836.520 --> 843.160] because you want to be you you want to be you regardless of the prizes or punishments out there okay [843.880 --> 850.600] if I was being truly authentic with you I would not show up for this I'm not joking that's [850.600 --> 855.080] that's a reality I wake up in I do this professionally by the way so I've already done one of [855.080 --> 860.280] these this morning for an hour and a half over in Niagara they put me on after Chris Hadfield [863.960 --> 871.400] he's a Canadian Space Man national hero thanks for your programming I wake up in the morning [871.400 --> 879.240] and I go the last thing I want to do at an instinctual gut level is to stand in front of a bunch [879.240 --> 888.040] of people who I don't know who I have no data around because I can't see them and and put out [888.040 --> 895.480] there my life's work in front of them for for them to criticize if they want to that's not what I [895.480 --> 901.320] want to do and when I start to get that feeling if you really want to see the authentic me the [901.320 --> 908.040] real me because build it and they will come when I start to get the feeling that you don't respect [909.320 --> 917.960] the past has anybody here has anybody here written three books on body language and behavior I'll [917.960 --> 930.600] just answer for you no so that you should judge me at all is stupidity on your part [932.280 --> 940.360] this is the authentic me this is what I really feel and here's the reality your safe here because [940.360 --> 950.200] you've got this stuff in front of you but if I came up close and showed you the real signals [950.840 --> 957.080] of predator which are the real signals I want to display in front of this kind of large crowd [957.400 --> 963.960] I guarantee you don't like me so much now do you so [978.280 --> 979.560] this stuff works so well [980.200 --> 989.880] so I choose my behaviors around you and I'm going to tell you again because what's coming up for me [989.880 --> 998.280] is a really important message for you and if I act authentically honestly in front of you [998.760 --> 1004.840] you're not going to listen to me and I hope you listen to this because it's really important [1005.800 --> 1010.520] I want you to have a look around you right now that is in a piece of rhetoric I mean actually look [1010.520 --> 1016.840] around you right now and and look at the back because there's lots of people here okay there's a lot [1016.840 --> 1026.600] of you there's about a thousand of you here today understand this your design to be indifferent to [1026.600 --> 1032.920] each other your design today to really just hang out with the people that you came with your spot [1032.920 --> 1040.040] a few others who I like you your tribal members yeah oh pretty yeah nice yeah great isn't it [1040.040 --> 1046.440] yeah but you've seen some people already today and they triggered predator in you enemy [1046.440 --> 1057.000] and more important you know who they are yeah and you've also met some people today the majority [1057.000 --> 1061.960] here and you don't know who they are you're indifferent to them and you're never going to [1061.960 --> 1072.520] meet them and you've got a brilliant life-changing idea for you your family your your town your city [1072.520 --> 1078.520] your world your universe and beyond that if you've got an intelligence wavy on mind which undoubtedly [1078.520 --> 1089.560] together you certainly all have can't believe I said that you've got some brilliant ideas and [1089.560 --> 1096.520] they've got some brilliant ideas but you're designed to be indifferent to each other so I'm [1096.520 --> 1104.680] asking you today I'm challenging you and in fact I'm just going to beg you okay just going to [1104.680 --> 1116.280] beg you I need you to be more inauthentic with each other today not just today tomorrow the day after [1116.280 --> 1125.480] and for the rest of your life because if you don't choose behaviors beyond your natural instincts [1125.480 --> 1132.760] for what you like and don't like you will miss brilliant opportunities in your life and if you [1132.760 --> 1138.040] don't go up to somebody today who you know at a gut level you're indifferent to they hold nothing [1138.040 --> 1142.920] for you your instinct you've smelled it you've tasted it you've seen it you've heard it you know [1143.000 --> 1152.120] they are nobody if you don't go up to them today and act and perform like their friend [1152.840 --> 1162.520] and ask them about their big idea and act and perform like you're listening you will miss [1162.520 --> 1171.960] something that is going to change your life so I'm begging you to act anything else [1172.520 --> 1182.920] but indifferent to the people around you today if I believe we could all be a little more [1182.920 --> 1192.520] inauthentic with each other now and again we might find that we are so much more than what we [1192.520 --> 1204.520] think we are we might find that we are so much more than we actually are because I truly believe [1205.560 --> 1217.960] it isn't your innate ideas or abilities or behaviors or skills or position that defines or [1217.960 --> 1238.360] has to define who you really are it can be the conscious choices that you make in spite of all of that [1247.960 --> 1250.680] you