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601 | For example black mothers have identified anxiety and fear over the safety of their kids as the 1 stressor in their lives. What can be done? | 0 | null | null | 0 |
602 | Jackie Chan is actually a classically trained opera singer. | 0 | null | null | 0.3 |
603 | My friend asked me how I got so good at guitar. I told him I'm use to fingering minors. | 1 | 2.22 | 1 | 4.2 |
604 | Why was the wife worried that her husband was a light drinker? Every night, he'd go out and drink until it was light. | 1 | 2.55 | 1 | 0.4 |
605 | If you want something you've never had, be prepared to do something you've never done. | 0 | null | null | 0 |
606 | What do you call a caveman's fart? A blast from the past. | 1 | 2.58 | 1 | 0.3 |
607 | Welcome to ProbonoASL's Deaf Awareness Month Celebratory Educational Series! This thread will be the hub for all happenings this month! Each week will have a special topic, and series of guests for each day of the week ¤ | 0 | null | null | 0 |
608 | I'm making a film about emos. I really need to stop saying "cut!" at the end of each scene. | 1 | 2.16 | 1 | 0.95 |
609 | Last night I dreamt I was a muffler... It was exhausting. | 1 | 2.15 | 0 | 0 |
610 | 9 out of 10 doctors recommended for children to drink water instead of soda. That 1 doctor lives in flint michigan | 1 | 2.35 | 0 | 1.5 |
611 | A priest and a rabbi are walking down the street... An they see a young boy. The priests says, "you want to screw him?" The rabbi says, "out of what?" | 1 | 3.05 | 1 | 3.4 |
612 | "I've been giving out chances every time and all you do is let me down." - Taylor Swift. | 0 | null | null | 0 |
613 | I use a wheelchair. Whenever I'm at a job interview and they ask me what my greatest weakness is, I always want to say, "Stairs". | 1 | 2.8 | 0 | 0.7 |
614 | date: i like guys who are mysterious me: [afraid she may have learned my horrible secret] haha isn't it great that neither of us has ever made love to a snowman | 1 | 1.78 | 0 | 0 |
615 | not gonna lie, the Steve Kerr / Michael Jordan fight sounds kinda hot | 0 | null | null | 0.1 |
616 | What's the proper way to pronounce Mormon? The second m is silent. | 1 | 2 | 0 | 2.5 |
617 | Why is Italy shaped like a boot? Well, can't fit that much shit in a sneaker! | 1 | 2.3 | 0 | 2.2 |
618 | Billy West, who voices Philip J. Fry on "Futurama," intentionally made Fry's voice close to his natural voice for increased job security. It would be more difficult to replace him. | 0 | null | null | 0 |
619 | Notice: Due to overwhelming political pressure, Cracker Barrel will now be known as Caucasian Barrel. | 1 | 2.8 | 1 | 2.75 |
620 | You know it's time to move on when she develops an immunity to Rohypnol. | 1 | 1.42 | 0 | 3.1 |
621 | la croix tastes like orange crush that gave up on its dreams and got a job at a car dealership | 1 | 2.41 | 1 | 0.15 |
622 | I've been writing a joke about the whites, blacks and asians... But it's a bit racey. | 1 | 2.85 | 1 | 0.6 |
623 | Black people have 3 things that are white. Their eyeballs, their teeth, and... their masters | 1 | 1.7 | 0 | 4.2 |
624 | We shot this entire scene in an actual 100 year old barn that was still being used for livestock. It smelled lovely. Realistic Film Making | 1 | 1.82 | 1 | 0 |
625 | I've heard seven cancer jokes today. If I hear tumor it's gonna benign. | 1 | 2.47 | 0 | 0.8 |
626 | I imagine the overwhelming feeling of freedom a prisoner feels when they escape from jail is a lot like what I feel when we drop the kids off with their grandparents. | 1 | 2.94 | 1 | 0.4 |
627 | What did the Mexican say to the Italian? Que pasta? | 1 | 2.32 | 0 | 0.85 |
628 | [job interview] Boss: What's your greatest strength? Me: I have a booty that won't quit Boss: How's the rest of you? Me: Very noncommittal | 1 | 2.1 | 0 | 0.35 |
629 | "The Lion King" is the best-selling VHS tape of all time. | 0 | null | null | 0 |
630 | Where did the Mexican man hide when robbers entered his home? Hispanic room | 1 | 2.6 | 1 | 1.4 |
631 | My wife has threatened to leave me because of my obsession with horoscopes. It's taurus apart. | 1 | 2.85 | 1 | 0 |
632 | How does a Muslim close a door? Islams it! | 1 | 2.21 | 0 | 1.6 |
633 | When I ship something to a small town the address is always like: 7 HAPPY SUN CRESCENT When I ship something to a big city the address is always like: 666 NEEDLE ROAD, WIDDOW-MAKER BUILDING, NORTH OF THE BADLANDS, BUZZER 1313, ASK FOR 'THE REAPER' | 1 | 2.35 | 1 | 0.4 |
634 | What's the difference between a Transformer robot and a Transgender person? One is living in a spaceship and one is living a lie. | 1 | 1.63 | 0 | 3.8 |
635 | I don’t know who needs to hear this, but being gay is a blessing. | 0 | null | null | 0.25 |
636 | By design, many casinos avoid forcing patrons to make right angle turns as doing so forces us to call upon the decision-making parts of the brain. The carpets tend to be ugly and disorienting, as well, so you're more inclined to look up. | 0 | null | null | 0 |
637 | Maxim model Francoise Boufhal was my guest on a previous episode where she shared what it's like to be a beautiful woman who constantly gets hit on, why she friend-zones nice guys and why she goes out with guys who aren't good looking and even older men who aren't nice to her. | 0 | null | null | 0.3 |
638 | Listen to your instincts. Your gut is always right. It may be a little bloated sometimes...but it's right. | 1 | 2.27 | 1 | 0.1 |
639 | I just got a new job at a gay magazine. I'm a poofreader. | 1 | 1.74 | 1 | 1.75 |
640 | I won $3 million on the lottery this weekend so I decided to donate a quarter of it to charity. Now I have $2,999,999.75. | 1 | 2.6 | 1 | 0.05 |
641 | Today I saw a little boy wearing rags sitting on a curb. I said, "Awww, are you an orphan"? He said, "Yes, what gave me away?" I said, "Your parents." | 1 | 2.65 | 1 | 1.6 |
642 | Happiness is a common feeling rare to many of us. Are you happy as a gay man, like truly happy deep down your soul? Let's get talking. | 0 | null | null | 0.4 |
643 | When talking to her, ask 'open' questions, not closed. Open questions start with How, Why, Who, What. Closed questions are ones she can answer with just yes or no. | 0 | null | null | 0.1 |
644 | Please follow us for updates on where we are providing access! And feel free to tag us this account as a point of contact for folks looking for access to BLM events, and other social justice actions. | 0 | null | null | 0.15 |
645 | I told my kids that at their age I had to watch VHS tapes on school safety, and they said 'what's school safety?' | 1 | 2.37 | 0 | 0.4 |
646 | What do you call a woman on a cruise ship in Mexico using the diving board at the pool? A broad abroad on a board aboard. | 1 | 1.9 | 0 | 0.2 |
647 | The horse favored to win the Kentucky Derby had to pull out of the race. Apparently, someone dug up some of his homophobic tweets. | 1 | 2.15 | 0 | 1.15 |
648 | About one in eight Americans eat pizza on any given day. | 0 | null | null | 0.1 |
649 | WIFE: please come out of there so we can talk ME: [from cardboard box] i'm sorry come out of where? WIFE: [sigh] please exit the spacecraft | 1 | 2.4 | 1 | 0.15 |
650 | Got fired from the Wonka factory because I refused to let that hack name the result of eight years of intensive nougat science a 'Rim Tim Timbly Jimbly Bar' | 1 | 1.95 | 1 | 0 |
651 | This is the future of the world, where sustainability meets the globalization and inter-connectivity of tomorrow so that more people can benefit from Israel and Jewish National Fund.' ± JNFNC 19 Powered By JNF Love Grows In Israel | 0 | null | null | 0 |
652 | People overcome adversity all the time... Look at Beethoven. They told him he was deaf, but did he listen? | 1 | 2.58 | 0 | 0.35 |
653 | George and Amal, I couldn't agree with you more. I am joining forces with you and will match your $500,000 donation to 'March For Our Lives.' These inspiring young people remind me of the Freedom Riders of the 60s who also said we've had ENOUGH and our voices will be heard. | 0 | null | null | 0 |
654 | Sweet potatoes r rich in beta-carotene, helps balance skin's pH to combat dryness & promotes cell turnover health skin potatoes | 0 | null | null | 0 |
655 | The word "photography" comes from two Greek words that mean "writing with light." | 0 | null | null | 0 |
656 | On October 1st, 1861, Charles Darwin wrote in his journal: "I am very poorly today and very stupid and hate everybody and everything." | 1 | 2.6 | 1 | 0 |
657 | While Roald Dahl was a student, the nearby Cadbury chocolate factory would occasionally send boxes of new chocolates to his school for the students to try. It's believed that this likely inspired him to write his third children's book, "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory." | 0 | null | null | 0 |
658 | America is a country where half the money is spent buying food, and the other half is spent trying to lose weight. Fucking idiots. | 1 | 2.44 | 1 | 1.2 |
659 | ME: Herman Melville wasn't appreciated until he died. WRITER: Thanks, that means a lot. ME: [in my head] I need to make my threats clearer | 1 | 2.16 | 1 | 0.15 |
660 | "Nevermind, I'll find someone like you" - Adele | 0 | null | null | 0 |
661 | What's the difference between a deaf dog and a one night stand? The one never comes when he's called and the other never calls after he comes. | 1 | 2.21 | 0 | 1.2 |
662 | One of my favorite ways to warm up on a cold day is by having an intense panic attack | 1 | 2.63 | 1 | 0.2 |
663 | The US government once set a bunch of beer next to an atomic blast to see if it would still be drinkable after. Turns out, in the event of a nuclear war, beer is still safe to drink. | 1 | 2.33 | 1 | 0.2 |
664 | *watching The Olympics* I could probably do that if I practiced *watching auctioneer* wow I could never talk that fast in a million years | 1 | 1.87 | 1 | 0 |
665 | Couples who poke innocent fun at each other tend to have happier and stronger relationships, according to researchers. | 0 | null | null | 0 |
666 | Abulia: A complete inability to make decisions. | 0 | null | null | 0.1 |
667 | I think my girlfriend would be a great presidential candidate, Because she's so awesome at bringing up shit from the past. | 1 | 2.3 | 1 | 0.75 |
668 | You know you're watching Star Wars with Catholics when every time you hear "May the Force be with you," you hear, "And also with you." | 1 | 2.45 | 1 | 0.8 |
669 | Kid: mom, some kid is calling me gay mama: Hit him, in the face. Kid: I cant Mom: Why? Kid: Cause, he's so Cute!! | 1 | 1.84 | 0 | 1.85 |
670 | People with stronger friendships are better able to communicate strictly through facial expressions. | 0 | null | null | 0 |
671 | What is a Polish person's favorite weapon? A Warsaw... | 1 | 2.37 | 1 | 0.9 |
672 | MY DAD: You'll take care of me when I get older, right? ME: [Thinking about when I was little and he used to scrub the shampoo into my hair too hard] We'll see. | 1 | 2.58 | 1 | 0.15 |
673 | Why are there no transvestites in space? Because there is zero drag. | 1 | 2.47 | 0 | 1.65 |
674 | Just seen a burglar kicking his own door in. I asked: "What are you doing?" He said: "Working from home." | 1 | 3.7 | 0 | 0 |
675 | We are very grateful to JNF for sponsoring [our work].' - Gedeon Dagan, Professor Emeritus at Tel Aviv University Powered By JNF Love Grows In Israel Water Series | 0 | null | null | 0 |
676 | Today and every day, we celebrate the innovation, talent, and resilience of Black Trans/GNC people. No matter who tries to erase our community, know that you are loved, cherished, and valued. Happy Trans Day of Visibility from The Okra Project ¤â | 0 | null | null | 0.05 |
677 | What do u call a gay dinosaur? A mega-sore-ass | 1 | 1.75 | 0 | 2.3 |
678 | Making the arrangements for my wife's funeral is tough She keeps asking what I'm doing | 1 | 3.21 | 0 | 0.75 |
679 | My girlfriends period is on my birthday. Why does she always have to be so anal about everything? | 1 | 2.33 | 0 | 1.25 |
680 | You can't have a relationship without fights, but you can make a relationship worth the fight | 0 | null | null | 0 |
681 | When he filmed "Superbad," Christopher Mintz-Plasse was just 17 years old, so his mom had to be on set for his sex scene as McLovin. | 0 | null | null | 0.15 |
682 | Jupiter's outermost moon hasn't been seen since it was discovered in 2003. It's currently considered "lost." | 0 | null | null | 0 |
683 | To people like JK Rowling I have a serious question. . . Where are all of these hypothetical bathroom attacks from trans women? | 0 | null | null | 0.85 |
684 | What was your best PRIDE experience? Was it different from today's times? Auntie Red Tweet Tea | 0 | null | null | 0 |
685 | George Lucas pitched the idea of "Indiana Jones" to Steven Spielberg while they were building a sandcastle together in Hawaii. | 0 | null | null | 0 |
686 | Guy comes home with a flower bouquet... "Guess I'll have to spread my legs now", says the wife. "Why? Don't you have a vase?" the husband replies. | 1 | 2.4 | 0 | 1.05 |
687 | I yelled, 'COW!' at a woman on a bike as she rode by. She looked at me, gave me the finger, and turned back around and promptly plowed her bike into the cow. Well, I tried. | 1 | 3.68 | 0 | 1.1 |
688 | People with the highest IQs are less likely to have children than people with the lowest IQs. | 0 | null | null | 0.6 |
689 | Me: Yes, I'd like the Mexican massage. Masseuse: The what? Me: *hands him taco seasoning and sour cream* Masseuse: Me: Let's go, chop chop. | 1 | 1.45 | 1 | 1.7 |
690 | Dude 1: Hey, bro? Dude 2: Yeah bro? Dude 1: Can you pass me that pamphlet? Dude 2: Brochure | 1 | 3.06 | 1 | 0 |
691 | many people keep mint flavored products or even mint oil with them to avoid nausea. Also, rub some mint oil on your forehead for headache | 0 | null | null | 0 |
692 | The worst part about working for the department of unemployment is when you get fired you still have to show up the next day. | 1 | 3.4 | 1 | 0.2 |
693 | I wished I loved anything as much as white people love saying "gracias" at Mexican restaurants. | 1 | 2.94 | 1 | 1.1 |
694 | God removes some people from your life to protect you. Don't run after them! | 0 | null | null | 0 |
695 | God put you here for a reason, your purpose will find you, when it comes embrace it, don't reject it. | 0 | null | null | 0.15 |
696 | I owned a wife beater once. I can't believe I let someone else have all the fun! haha | 1 | 1.85 | 1 | 2.65 |
697 | God bless every firefighter and their families. fighting 3 weeks straight. still going. Imagine their exhaustion!Thomas Fire | 0 | null | null | 0 |
698 | People come in and go. That's life. | 0 | null | null | 0.1 |
699 | 2 tbs of Mayonnaise provide 12 percent of the daily required intake of Vitamin K which is essential for blood to clot properly | 0 | null | null | 0.15 |
700 | I'm organising a charity ball next week for people who struggle to reach orgasm Just let me know if you can't come. | 1 | 3 | 1 | 0.7 |